Things Don’t Happen To You, Things Happen For You
“Life will give you whatever experience is the most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness.” – Eckhart Tolle
I want to address the common belief that we’re victims of our current circumstance. In fact, I would say it’s the opposite—that we have been uniquely chosen to receive our current circumstance. What does this mean? Well, say that I was born in a working-class family, suffered from damaging relationships, or experienced severe mental distress (in my case, all of which are true), I would have two options.
OPTION 1: THE VICTIM MENTALITY
I could choose to perceive myself as a victim to my circumstances. By doing so, I use my circumstances to support beliefs such as “I will never be successful,” “I won’t have enough money,” “I will never have a healthy loving partner,” and “I will always be anxious.” I would also use these beliefs as excuses to explain my current state of life and see it as the reason for my unhappiness. For instance, I might tell myself “if only I grew up in a wealthy family then I could get a high paying job and then my life would be better” or “if only they didn’t hurt me, then I would be able to trust others.”
However, this kind of mentality negatively reinforces those circumstances that we are trying to grow away from. It keeps us stagnant in our current state and hinders our ability to see the situation for what it really is—a new experience and opportunity for growth.
OPTION 2: THE LIMITLESS MENTALITY
The other option that we have is to choose to believe that your current circumstance has been given to you by the universe itself! (or any other higher power) You might be thinking, ‘but why would the universe give me abusive partners, poverty, illness…’ or any other challenge you might be facing. It’s our own minds that are interpreting our circumstance as a limiting truth. This isn’t to say that any grief, injustice or sorrow you might have faced experiencing your circumstance isn’t valid, but rather that your circumstances are unique to your path.
From a spiritual POV, they are unique to the reason why you are here. They are unique to what you came here to experience. They are unique to what you need for your next phase in life. From a practical standpoint, they are here to help you best learn and grow. I was born in a working-class family so I could cherish the journey to abundance. I encountered unhealthy relationships so I could identify and experience healthy loving people in my life. I have suffered from extreme mental distress so I could empathize with others and serve as a guide to our innate wellness.
You are limitless. You are infinite potential. If you think some little situation is going to set you back for your entire life, be ready to prove yourself wrong.
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