10 Valuable Life Lessons No One Tells You
10 years! I have officially been in business for ten years! I have learned so much in this time that I thought I would share with you my top 10 most valuable lessons.
SEE ALSO: How To Ask For Help And Feel Ok About It
Intention – I set intentions to create the life that I want to experience
I begin just about everything with an intention so the universe can bring that experience to me. All of my classes, sessions and days have an intention. About 10 years ago, I even decided to have an intention word for each year and I can’t begin to explain the effect it’s had on me! It hasn’t always been pretty. I remember the year I chose the word happy and learned some serious humility. However, this gave me the freedom to not be attached to what others think of me, so I actually became happier.
Trust – I trust my decision and move forward to honor my growth
Sometimes you just have to make a decision and go with it. If you continually question your choices, you never embrace the experience. I’ll never forget when I was going back-and-forth in my mind on the name I had selected for my business. I vividly remember my guides interrupting my thoughts as I walked to the Secretary of State office. They said to me, “Dena, we honestly don’t care what you name your business. Choose something, trust it and move on. We are going to support it no matter what it is called.” They also said, “We do like that it makes people sing as soon as they say it.” And it was then that I knew it was the right decision.
Ask – I ask and say thank you because it never hurts to ask
Many of us suck at asking for help but there is so much freedom in receiving. And, by allowing ourselves to receive, we give a gift to the giver as well. Asking supports our intentions. I can’t imagine where I’d be if I didn’t ask to work part-time at my day job many years ago. It was my jumping off point to transition to my current business full time. And I never expected my old boss to say yes―but he did!
Vulnerability – I allow myself to be vulnerable and I set myself and everyone else free
This one starts out pretty damn icky but OH MY GOSH I can’t even begin to explain the freedom you can experience! I have taken classes with my peers and I often volunteer to be the vulnerable guinea pig because I know the experience will be powerful. Being vulnerable with close friends is the best. You just continually give each other permission to be human and more lovable! The more you do it, the easier it gets.
Knowing – I know that I am successful
It’s only recently that I’ve embraced the power of knowing. It is an impetus to our experiences. I decided to know that I would get in better shape and lose the weight I gained over the past two years. It is slowly happening and will continue. I take doable steps to make it happen because there is no other option. I am not following any fitness plan; I allow it to be easy. And I don’t beat myself up too bad when I have freak-out chocolate moments.
Release – Everything happened as it should and I am safe
My husband taught me this valuable lesson. Though I am still actively working on it, the time and energy I’ve already saved are remarkable. You may have read in a previous newsletter about the time he said to me, “I’m sorry for what I did. I am doing the best I can now. If I could change the past, I would….but I can’t.” Yup, Mr. Wise. Now every time I want to freak out about something that happened in the past, I hear his voice. I cannot change my prior choices, responses to others or how others respond to me, so continuing to argue with myself or anyone else in my head is a waste of time.
Allow – Not my journey
Allowing others to have their experiences without feeling the need to do anything about it is badass―and not easy for those of us who like to be helpful and pleasing. I word it this way for my ego, “Who the hell do I think I am trying to take on their experience? It’s their lesson, not mine.” Sometimes it helps. If a friend makes a choice that I would not have made and the what-ifs start in my head, I simply say, “Not my journey.” I also know that everything will work out as it’s meant to, and this opens up head space for wonder and amazement.
Help – Be a helper! You never know what people are going through
Nothing is truer than the fact that we will receive more when we give more―as long as we give from the heart. If we give from guilt or ego the energy cannot be fulfilling. I recently gave from guilt and got upset when it wasn’t received the way I wanted. Well duh! Sometimes you have to check in and ask yourself, “Am I giving from the heart?” See how the answer feels and be authentic to you.
Presence – I enjoy being and love each moment
One of the stories I always told myself is that I’m a doer. In fact, I didn’t know who I was unless I was doing something. I didn’t know how to tell people no without listing off my to-do list. Well, I have pulled back and started to say no from time to time so I can allow myself time to just be. I am becoming a be-er. I have some freak-out moments but, for the most part, I love it! As my friend Susie reminded me, there is nothing that I HAVE to do. You have to sit with that thought for a moment, but when it catches hold of you…FREEDOM!
Gratitude – I am grateful for all of my experiences and my life brings me blessings
I think most of you know the power of gratitude. It is my go-to when I’m in a funk. And because there can never be too much gratitude, I want to take this opportunity to say, THANK YOU to each and every one of you. Thank you for all the love, support, emails, text messages, gifts and MOMENTS. Thank you for allowing me to hold space for you. Thank you for your trust. Some of you have been through the most horrific experiences and still find a way to share love every day and I am grateful for you. You have helped make the last 10 years truly remarkable.
Mantra: I am always learning and I embrace my lessons.
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