How To Stop Living In Suffering And Make Peace With Your Emotions…


How To Stop Living In Suffering And Make Peace With Your Emotions

As I sat down to write a new article from the comfort of my home desk, I felt a sense of calm. The sound of silence, the warm cup of coffee beside me, the golden sunshine coming through my window gave me the perfect setting for writing. Time flew by, words started flowing, I was in the zone. Then suddenly, I heard a loud voice of an angry woman from outside my window. As I looked out, I found she was speaking to someone on the phone. At first, I tried to ignore it, assuming it would end in a while. But, the woman kept on going.

I felt agitated because I couldn’t concentrate on my writing. I keep mornings reserved for creative work because that’s when I can focus the best to produce high-quality work. I was hoping the woman will stop or go away, but it didn’t seem she was ready to leave. I kept getting more irritated as the time passed by because I was losing my morning bliss. To make it stop, I could either wear headphones and listen to some music or I could go out to ask the woman to keep it down. I was about to get up, but then the woman went away and the noise stopped.

As the day went by, I found myself off. I was dragging a bad mood throughout my entire day to every activity I was doing. Before I realized it, I found myself complaining about everything — the internet, the mobile network, the emails I needed to process, and everything in between. Later in the evening, I stopped and asked myself — why am I behaving this way? I kept wondering until I finally realized that it all started with that small incident in the morning.

That little experience set the trigger for my bad mood and dictated my mood for the entire day without me even realizing it. I was unfocused, cranky, and lived the whole day with a frown on my head for no big reason. In retrospect, nothing tragic happened to me the entire day, and yet I was miserable for a long time because of one small event. As soon as I had that realization, I re-centered myself to feel calm and everything was back to normal.

How many times do we let a small trigger alter our state of mood? It’s even worse when we drag that emotion through the entire day in everything we do. A comment from a colleague, an unwanted life event, a poor experience, an overwhelming list of tasks, negative news, and so on can trigger a bad mood in an instant. If we’re not careful, these events can affect our entire days, change the way we view the world, make us less empathetic and even negatively affect the mood of the people we encounter.

So how do you prevent being a victim of your bad mood? After a lot of trial and error, I found out the best solutions that work for me. Alter the approach or experiment to find which one works best for you in your particular situation.

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Fixing a bad mood

Becoming aware

The first step to all change is awareness. When you find yourself in a bad mood, identify the first incident that triggered negative emotions in you. Sometimes, it may be a silly issue and other times, the issue may be more significant. If you identify an insignificant trigger, simple awareness is enough to get back to a calm state.

Being aware and taking the opposite action

When you find a significant trigger, you’d need an action along with awareness. Usually, you want it to be an opposite action that may fix the issue. If you have direct control over the situation, fixing the issue may be the right thing to do. For example, you may feel bad about not treating a loved one properly. The opposite action is to drop the ego and apologize to the person.

Performing a mood-reset action

When you feel upset about something you can’t control, you can use a mood-reset action to get back on track. Maybe you failed at something or some uncertain event ruined your plans for the day. In such cases, resetting mood with simple actions work wonders. Some examples of mood-reset actions include exercising or walking, listening to music, eating, hydrating, taking a shower, sleeping, relaxing, being alone, socializing, laughing, switching off social media, decluttering, organizing, planning and more.

Taking a spiritual action

A lot of times, occupying your mind with other activities won’t work, especially if it’s an issue related to a relationship. It could be a relationship with a loved one or it could be the relationship with yourself. In those cases, you can use spirituality to heal your mood. It could mean forgiving, accepting, letting go or being grateful. These practices may help you get past the emotional blocks and release emotional tension. You can use guided meditation, silence, pen and paper or affirmations to resolve such issues.

Preventing a bad mood

Now you know how to fix a bad mood, but how about training yourself so you can prevent it in the first place? While having a bad mood is a natural human tendency, it’s a good idea to reduce such occurrences so you can live in a beautiful state and spread that state to people around you.

Training your mindfulness muscle

The simplest way to train your mindfulness muscle is to practice mindfulness meditation regularly. The more you train your mind to identify your thoughts and emotions, the easier it will be for you to spot a bad mood trigger and acknowledge it as soon as it occurs. Otherwise, you may stay in a bad mood for too long wondering what may have caused it.

Being a source of positivity

Think of yourself as a force of positivity. Instead of waiting for others to spread their emotional state on you, flip it around and lead with kindness and positivity. Spread random acts of kindness or thoughts throughout your day and positivity will come back to you. Some examples of kind acts or thoughts include forgiving, accepting, loving, appreciating, complimenting, encouraging, listening and making people laugh.

Developing emotional resilience

Emotional resilience is your ability to deal with a stressful situation or emotional crisis. When you encounter uncertain life situations or unwanted emotions, how quickly can you adapt to them and bounce back to normal? It’s not something you’re born with, rather you develop it if you train yourself to be more emotionally resilient.

Becoming emotionally resilient is an ongoing process, it’s not something you achieve once. To develop it, practice everything mentioned earlier, take responsibility for your emotions and persevere during the tough times. Remember, every situation is an opportunity to train yourself to find your inner peace again.

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Prakhar Verma

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Prakhar’s mission is to help ambitious people design their lives for growth, peace, freedom, and fulfillment. He writes about life,…

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