To The Recent College Grads: 7 Ways To Manifest The Life You Want
So let’s cut the BS. Post-graduate life is not everything it’s cracked up to be. Yes, you no longer have the insidious thought of homework lurking in your psyche at all times of the day, triggering sleepless nights. Yes, you have much more freedom now that you are not limited to a rigid class, work, and extracurricular schedule. But the hole left by all of this collegiate activity is oftentimes filled with a particularly cruel existential dread and crippling panic (can you say, student loans?).
The “future” that our young lives have been leading up to is here. The “rest of our lives” starts now. What the hell are you going to do with your ungodly long and extremely short time on this planet?
Sweet, okay, we got our freakouts out of the way. Moving on.
After some of my most stressed out times and lowest moments of spiraling panic about the future, one of the most helpful things I have turned to in order to get myself back on track has been a series of self-help books, podcasts, and articles. Yeah, yeah, you might be about to click out of the webpage now or start searching YouTube for live videos of a giraffe giving birth, but hear me out, dudes.
The book that I’m going to tell you about CHANGED MY LIFE. I’m saying this without any associations to the book or author. There are no affiliate links here or monetary ways that my explanation and love of this book will benefit me. I want to talk about it because it’s just that good and I think it can help people who feel a little lost and need that extra nudge in the rear.
This book was that ass-kicking that my stumbling, insecure (nobody likes you when you’re), 23-year-old self needed to freakin’ hear at this exact point in my life when quarter-life-existential-crises are pretty much everyday occurrences. Mostly because, like, now that I’ve spent a MAJORITY of my young life being told what to do and when to do it, and now that that familiar sense of “stability” is gone, it’s only normal to kinda freak out a little. Or a lot…
This book by Jen Sincero called “You are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life”, is where it’s freaking AT my dudes. Jen here understands the perfect mixture of compassion and kick-assery needed to maintain hold of our technology-plagued attention spans. She breaks up the book into 5 main parts: How You Got This Way, How to Embrace Your Inner Badass, How to Tap into the Motherlode, How to Get Over Your BS Already, and How to Kick Some Ass.
She breaks it down so easily, giving pointers on how to go about becoming a rock star of self-love and personal success. In this article, I want to break things down a bit further and bring you the meaty parts of what I learned. I’ve highlighted 5 of what I’ve deemed the most important parts of her lessons on how to be a total fucking badass. Here goes:
Sadly these aren’t the laws of how to best go about attracting a lover or the laws of what constitutes being attractive. These laws simply say that whatever energy you put out into the world is the energy that you will get back from the world. If you are cold and judgmental to the people in your life, you will receive coldness and judgment back. If you are kind, compassionate, and gracious to others, you’ll find that this is how others will treat you.
Obviously, the system is not cut and dry. Kind people get treated like crap and crappy people often get treated like kings. The world is not always just. But essentially, the Laws of Attraction have a bit more to do with your patterns of thought and your beliefs. Within “You Are a Badass”, the Laws of Attraction are essential in knowing how to manifest your desires.
2) How to start implementing the Laws and attracting/manifesting your ideal life.
Getting your mind right is absolutely essential when taking steps to a kickass life and implementing the Laws of Attraction. It’s so important to take time to sit with yourself quietly and learn how to listen to that subtle “yes” feeling. Call it your intuition, your gut, your heart, or your soul, THIS step is key.
By learning how the system (YOUR system) was programmed, you can begin to dismantle the parts that don’t serve you. You can learn a lot about yourself when you take the time to learn how to quiet all of the junk that constantly bombards your thoughts, and begin to understand the things that truly speak to your core. Learning more about yourself and your true desires will set you up to figuring out what will make you feel like your life is a vast field of flowery sunshine-y joy.
3) Manifest, manifest, manifest
Now that you know yourself a little bit better and know more about the things that you truly desire, it’s time to start making shit happen. Believing that what you desire is possible and available to you is just as important as knowing what your deepest and strongest desires for your life are in the first place.
Jen explains that you must have both unwavering faith that that which you desire is possible as well as an attitude of gratitude. This isn’t a thing just because of the rhyme, people. It’s possibly the MOST important step in this whole process. Telling yourself again and again that what you desire is possible is one thing, but having gratitude for something that has not yet become true in your life amps up your belief to a whole new level. To be thankful for something that hasn’t happened yet almost forces you to believe in its inevitability.
Think about it for a second. Gratitude is most often wired in our brains as an emotion that follows when something good has happened to us. So it’s natural if we truly feel gracious for something, it increases our belief in its reality.
4) Find your coach, guru, mentor, and/or spiritual guide
Who is living a life that already resembles the one that you want? Who is doing the work and finding their own success that really inspires you to do the same?
Finding a mentor who is able to guide you along a path you want to take will absolutely skyrocket your growth. If you have ever had a teacher, coach, or mentor of some sort in your life that has really helped you grow, you already know how special this sort of relationship can be.
Yes, there are plenty of ways to motivate yourself to do the research and make moves on your own, but having another person there by your side who is willing and able to help you along your personal path of growth will bring you to a whole different level. With someone else by your side cheering you on, it will be less tempting to blow off a guitar lesson, or yoga practice, or whatever it is that you are making a part of your life-bettering process.
5) Love yourself
And the rest will fall into place. The final ingredient to every single one of Jen’s step-by-step is to “Love Yourself”. A crucial and often overlooked step to creating a badass life, loving yourself is how things you wish to manifest will fall in place naturally. Loving yourself fiercely, unconditionally, and kindly is like the magic frosting atop the cupcake of your life.
Without some radical self-love, things you want to do and be and see are still very attainable. But by loving yourself throughout the whole process, you’ll be much much happier. Loving yourself is the sister to loving your life, and loving your life is what it’s all about anyways, my friends. Life can get pretty weird sometimes, especially for young graduates. If you have gone to school traditionally, you have spent a majority of your young life in a school institution, regulated by bells, books, and other people’s rules. Even if you’re a non-traditional student, vast chunks of your life have been dedicated to being educated in public, private, or home-schooled situations.
Now that you have graduated from whatever post-secondary education you were a part of, you’re in what is commonly referred to as the “real world”. You may have had vague ideas about what this world was going to look like, but no one and nothing ever really prepares you for what life will be like outside of these institutions. It’s the most terrifyingly liberating thing to realize that there are no rules and there are no guides. No more bells dictating where you need to be and when. No more adult figures guiding what information you focus on and digest. You are free to choose this all for yourself.
This is your one and only chance to live your one and only life. Are you going to sit on the sidelines and wait, merely watching it pass and following whatever person with a blow horn comes along? Or are you going to stand up, get your own freakin’ blow horn, and start to build the life that you want. A life like that feels pretty damn beautiful because it’s one that you’ve created.
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