How To Turn Your Pain Into Your Power…

How To Turn Your Pain Into Your Power

The other day, I ran into an ex lover of mine.

I was sitting in a small cafe here in Boulder, deep in conversation with a friend, when I looked over to my left and saw her.

Sitting just a few tables away from her, we locked eyes for a split second.

 I noticed a wave of fear and tension instantly come over my body. I turned back towards my friend, and desperately attempted to “push down” the waves of discomfort I was experiencing.

Yet despite my best efforts to stay present, I found myself splitting my attention between the conversation I was having and the image of her in my periphery.

After about forty five minutes of this, I said goodbye to my friend, left the cafe and went about my day.

However, something felt distinctly off. It was as if I was in a perpetual fog, subtly disconnected from myself.

 As I took a moment to ground, I realized that I was once again running from my experience, instead of allowing myself to fully feel it.

The whole thing got my thinking about what your relationship to pain is. How do you manage the painful feeling that arise in your body?

You see we all have ways to escape our pain. Sometimes we stimulate ourselves through social media, television and Netflix binges. Or perhaps we might eat sweets excessively, drink alcohol, and watch porn.

Anything we can do to take our minds out of the present moment. Which when we are still, can often come with the pain and discomfort of what we have been avoiding.

But what if we were to just sit with what arises?

What if we were to stop resisting, and simply allow ourselves to feel?

What might be possible?

This has been my personal practice recently, and it has been wildly uncomfortable. Truly and utterly uncomfortable.

There have been times where i’ve noticed myself perpetually reaching for something to distract myself.

Yet the more I engage in this practice, the more I realize the potential if has for something magnificent. A gateway to massive personal power.

The power that comes only from making the decision not to run.. not to fight.. but to simply, be. In doing so we give ourselves a space to fully process and release. So that we may move forward from a place of inner peace.

So, I challenge you take some time to sit with whatever you’ve been running from. Pick a time to be still and simply feel into what ever discomfort arises in you.

I promise you, the more you hold space for your entire range of messy, uncontrollable, uncomfortable human experience.

The more powerful you will feel.

In the end the only parts of ourselves that can truly scare us, are the parts that we refuse to see.


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Dan Hochman


Dan Hochman is a hormonal health/empowerment coach and writer based out of Boulder, Colorado. He received his health coaching certification…

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