Glass Half Empty?
Are you a glass half empty kinda gal or guy? Did you know there are studies showing once the glass is half empty in our minds, it is much harder to ever think of it as half full? So, we have to be very deliberate in changing how we think. It does make sense, our minds seem hard-wired to look for problems verses looking at how great things are. If we look for what is going wrong, we can formulate plans on how to protect ourselves from it. We have been taught to be survivors, and to survive this life you have to be prepared for what could go wrong!
So, our minds are looking for the problems first and solutions second.
My mind: Oh possible rejection, do not invite people out! I might look unattractive in these pants, new outfit! I might be unqualified for that job, OK do not apply! It might disturb people if I say what I am thinking, OK don’t speak my truth! I am killing myself by working too much, but don’t want to disappoint my family, OK keep working! I want to live my dreams, but I heard that’s impossible, OK stay in the rat race!
Now, with this type of thinking, I have taken the step to identify the problem, and change my behavior to protect myself. If we see the problems of the world first, and then respond to them from a place of pessimism and fear, this can be our inner dialogue. I lived like this for years! The problem with this way of thinking is it’s a trap and life can become something to shield ourselves from. Our cups can become very, half full with this type of outlook.
When I first started this work, of expanding my mind, I literally saw an image in my head of me inside what looked like a cement box. The box had a little hole in the top for air and light. In this image, I saw myself poke my head out of that little hole in the top of the box and look around. I examined this image and I noticed, there were no guards making me stay in the box, it was not locked, the only reason I appeared to be in the box is because I was staying in it, of my own accord. It appeared I was making sure no one could get to me. I wanted protection from the problems and challenges of my life. How could I possibly have a half-full glass, when I couldn’t even find any reason to come out of my box?
I’ll tell ya, it was a choice, I couldn’t take one more day of detachment from myself, from people and from life. I want happiness, and I don’t know how. I want intimate relationships and I don’t know how. I want more abundance and I don’t know how. I had to accept that, I don’t know how, and that is OK. I had to shift from my life in a protective box, always looking for the problem and noticing how empty my glass was, to the life of a student, reaching for a better feeling and attempting to be optimistic. No matter how vulnerable I looked and felt. No matter, if I turned bright red trying to express my true feelings, no matter if I wore clothes that were not fabulous and people looked at me funny. Through the process of getting out of my protective box, I learned to love myself just the way I was. I had to change my protective habits, I had to tell myself daily, “I am worth it.”
I have changed from surviving my life, to now thriving in my life, and my glass isn’t half full, it’s running over with abundance. It took some courage, it took hard love with myself, determination, a sense of humor, and a whole lot of love for this lady right here. My glass has turned into many glasses. It might take time, it might take baby steps, but once your glass is half full, you can have as many glasses as you’d like, and keep filling them up! If you are a glass half empty type, know, you are worth it! Do the self-work and fill watch as your cup fills!
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