The Ugly Truth About Fighting Anxiety

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“Doubt everything. Find your own light.” ― Gautama Buddha

The word doubt has such a negative context to it. Many people out there believe “doubt means don’t.” There was a time in my life where I believed this too.

I have had my fair share of doubts in life. I’ve doubted my path in life. I questioned the choices I have made and if I am where I am supposed to be. I have played the “what if” game far too many times. I have questioned everything from my career path and my degree choice to where I live, to my personal relationships, to the clothes I am wearing. You name it, I probably doubted it at one point or another.

SEE ALSO: Puruṣārtha: The 4 Life Goals Of Hinduism

Overwhelming Doubt

There was a phase in my life where the doubt became overpowering. I started to feel like no matter where I was or what I was doing in my life, I would question it. It became exhausting and truly took the life out of me. I wondered how I got there and how the heck I was supposed to fix it.

How could I ever be happy with anything in my life if all I did was question it and second guess myself?

I know I needed to trust the choices I have made in my life and the path I was on. I know I needed to have a simple shift in perspective to become grounded again. I racked my brain trying to understand why I felt this way. I think a lot of it had to do with getting older and wiser, and by no means am I old (I will be 27 in December).

I remember being younger and having this vision of where I would be at when I was “older.” At 27 I imagined myself to be done with school, have a great career, own a home, and maybe be married with a kid or two. News flash – I do not have any of those things. I am still working on my degree, I still have no idea what I want to do with my career, I have no children, and I have been renting a one bedroom apartment with my boyfriend of six years.

These things are by no means bad, but I am in a very different place than I thought I would be, and that is OKAY!

Time For a Change

I started to realize I was probably feeling an immense amount of self-doubt because I didn’t feel like I was at where I was supposed to be. I had set this timeline of rules for myself, and I failed at them. I didn’t want to feel this doubt anymore, so I know I needed to make a change.

I began to ask myself questions and challenge myself. I would ask myself things like “what would make you the happiest version of you?” or “if you could change one thing in your life what would it be?” What I found was actually rather interesting. I realized the things that would make me the happiest version of me, I already had, and the things I would want to change were totally attainable and realistic.

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I believe so many of us can get caught up in the past and future. I know it is one of my flaws and something I work on everyday to be better at. When you live in the past or future it takes away from your current happiness. The past is the past, leave it there. The future has not happened yet, so don’t worry about it too much. This was something I struggled with.

Trust in Your Own Choices

I began to realize that I am exactly where I am supposed to be. Because the choices I made in the past led me to be here, and those choices were something I wanted at that point and time. Those choices transformed and shaped me into the person I am today, and the choices I make today will continue to shape me. I needed to trust my choices. You need to trust your choices. We are all wiser and stronger than we believe.

Instead of questioning those choices I should be completely grateful that I am where I am and trust that I am the only one who knows what is best for me. So I did just that, I trusted myself. Once I began to give myself more credit and trust myself, the doubt inside me began to fade away.

I heard one time that having doubts in life means you are conscious and rational and not having doubts would actually be scarier than having doubts. When you doubt, you are rationalizing your feelings. You are speaking to yourself trying to understand something. This is by no means a bad thing, this is good for your soul.

If you find yourself feeling doubtful in your life ask yourself questions that may help clear it up. Ask yourself what would make you the happiest? Or if you could change one thing what would it be? Whatever questions suit you, ask them, and answer them.

We truly harbor the keys to our happiness, we all just have to look deeply within to find them.

Doubt is Healthy

Remind yourself that feeling doubtful is a healthy, normal, part of life and you are never alone no matter how lonely it may seem at times.

If I have learned anything in life it’s that there will always be highs and lows. There will always be good times and bad times, and there will always be times when you feel like you don’t have it all together.

We are human, we make mistakes, we have flaws, we feel doubt, we can question our sanity at times, and that is what makes us human.

If you are feeling doubtful today, or ever, remind yourself that it is nothing to be ashamed of. Remind yourself that what you are feeling is natural and normal. Ask the necessary questions, and trust yourself that you know what is best for you. Once you begin to believe in yourself any signs of doubt will begin to clear.