Dear. Future. Significant. Other.

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Just a few things I want to go over so you have some sense of what you’re getting into. OK, great! Let’s dive right in.

1. I don’t make sense. And I’m not sure I ever will. I mean, I’m sensiBLE. Quite  sensible, actually, but I don’t make sense in the way that most people need other people to make sense. And also not in the way that most women don’t make sense. (Well, that’s all probably true for me, too, let’s be honest.) ***Pause Here for a check-in*** If you’re even mildly annoyed at my rambling already as opposed to finding it, say, cute and intriguing, that could be some important information for you to be aware of. Life is a process of elimination. I trust you’re eliminating effectively. But there’s always been something about me that, while my nonsensical ways may be what make me attractive to some, I always get the impression that people are scared of me. Maybe scared isn’t the right word. I don’t know. Confused; perplexed; drawn in, yet, resistant; interested from afar; want to dip their feet in the pool, but don’t want to get wet. ***Insert sex joke here***
2. I feel everything. I’ll say it again. I. Feel. Everything. Listen, even *I* am a little exhausted over the recent surge of “You Might Be an Empath If…” articles swimming out there, but that’s some real shit. Here’s the deal: my life path is constantly and directly impacted by the fact that I’m an empath. It’s beautiful, and it’s a struggle. I cry most days. I need a LOT of alone time for both energetic/emotional recovery and protection. I can naturally see through people’s bullshit even if I’ve only just met them. And if I’m not grounded enough, I can completely shut down around people who aren’t being true to themselves.
3. At my best, I am playful, loving, moon obsessed, animal loving, dirty joke making, laughing, laughing, laughing, cat staring, music listening, Listening listening, sensual vibing, sex-ing, candle lighting, singingggggg. At my worst, when things are shit, I’ve forgotten that it’s all good. It’s all good.
4. I have a big butt. And I need you to not only be OK with that, I need you to love it. I will lose and gain the same 20–40 pounds over and over again, but no matter my size, I will always have a big butt. I need you to not only be OK with that, I need you to love it.
5. I need to be touched.
6. I have a mental health issue that doctors don’t understand. Yes, I have anxiety. Yes, I have depression. It seems like people are at least starting to get used to talking about those things, now, and I’m happy to have ways to manage them. But I have another issue that is apparently a mystery, meaning, there is not (yet) a clear answer as to how to appropriately treat it. It’s not an every day thing, but I mention it because it’s traumatic. Traumatic for both me and the people that care about me. So much so, that I have lost/am prepared to lose people who are dear to me as a result.
7. I’m a singer. Did I tell you that? Professionally trained, actually. But I’ve been in the closet for a long time. Probably part of the reason I’ve been single my whole life. Maybe. I love to sing.
8. I see dead people. *Sudden understanding of why people seem scared of me.* But, yeah. It’s a thing. I hear them, and I see them, and I sometimes talk to them. Stay with me, now. If you are, in fact, my Dear. Future. Significant. Other., this is not a thing that would scare you. Because you get it. You were always meant to get it. You already understand the transient nature of the Universe. You already understand that time isn’t real, that the things we say are things aren’t really things (even when I say, “It’s a thing.”), that everything is energy in a constant state of change, and our resistance to that change is the only non-thing keeping us from moving into our highest state of being until the day we move back in with the stars.

Sooooo, what do you want to eat??

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dear - adj. - regarded with deep affection; cherished by someone: “a dear friend”

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future - n. - the time or a period of time following the moment of speaking or writing; time regarded as still to come: “we plan on getting married in the near future”

significant - adj. - sufficiently great or important to be worthy of attention; noteworthy: “a significant increase in sales”

other - adj. - denoting a person or thing that is different or distinct from one already mentioned or known about: “stick the camera on a tripod or some other means of support”